It isn't always pretty ... #MotherhoodInTheRaw

Owen didn't get any teeth until he was over a year old.

Since then, whenever the teeth come, they like to come with a vengeance and make a very grand entrance, sometimes in pairs, and often with the typical teething symptoms we have come to expect -- the fussiness, sleeplessness, looser stools, runny nose, drool central. Luckily, we haven't had any fevers, that is until yesterday!

He has 3 teeth and is currently working on at least a 4th and 5th at the moment. For whatever reason, these ones are so much worse. If I ever so briefly wiped a booger from beneath his nose, he would melt down. And I know that is not uncommon for 15 months (he has tested out a few tantrums!), but he was basically unconsolable. He was very moody. The only thing that would make him happy and keep him calm was snuggling against mama's chest, being held nice and cozy on my lap.

Normally, this little guy is go-go-go. He is always on the move. He is squiggly and wiggly in my arms, always trying to look around or get down. But yesterday, he just wanted to be held.

I can't say I minded the cuddles, taking in the scent of his hair and feeling the soft skin of his back, trying to memorize his babyhood before he gets all grown up on me ...

But it is so hard to see him so miserable!

We spent a majority of the morning just snuggling and nursing. I dared not do anything to upset him, especially put him down before he was ready. Since we had gone for a run that morning, I was still in a sports bra, sweaty Nike tank top and running shorts, and full disclosure, I didn't smell great. OK, I smelled horrible. (Side note: why does this not bother babies?! Are they programmed to like our odor?)

But this was motherhood in the raw. Body odor. Oily hair that hadn't been washed in maaannny days. Arm nearly falling off from holding giant 30-pounder. Tears, tears and tears. Trying all the remedies. Casting aside any notion of productivity, to-do lists or plans. Being fully present, uncomfortable, exhausted, and needing to pee but being too afraid of putting him down and upsetting him - ha!

It was lots of real life - no filters, no cute angles, no golden light streaming through the window or perfectly staged "candids." This wasn't the Instagram version of motherhood. This was raw motherhood, full of moments where I considered bringing in reinforcements but was too proud to ask, moments where it felt like the rest of the world was worlds apart, like I was all alone in some sort of teething vortex.

By nighttime, he was running a temp. We gave him some Motrin and he slept much better. A new day dawned, and a new boy emerged. He was his usual fun, silly, happy self.

Mama took a shower, washed her hair and put on a little makeup. Mama got out of the house and took her boy to the park. Mama felt brand new.

Isn't it funny how these moments can make us feel like we're sinking and yet pass so quickly? It's not always pretty. But it's also not always tough. Some days are draining, and others are so full of joy I wonder what I did before I became a mother.

But that's all part of it - the ups and downs. Finding the beauty in each part.